Yikes! *scramble* December 10, 2008

Oh boy.

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Selling Pampered Chef products has been working out real well for me. They don’t have very high requirements. One of them is to make $200 in sales every two months, which is not difficult at all. Except that this month I had my only two shows cancel on me, which means that I have to scrape up $145 in sales before the month is over. Not too hard hopefully. I just have to scramble a bit to find the orders.

I’m not worried. I know that I’ll just try my best and what ever happens after that… happens. That’s all you can ever do, right?

I absolutely refuse to get stressed about something that is out of my control. It just doesn’t do you any good. There are times when I might get stressed about something within my power to change, but if I go so far as to actually start worrying about it, I normally just start doing something about it.

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They say that worry doesn’t help anything. Who says? I have no idea. I say. I say it all the time. And I believe it.

Several Surprises August 18, 2008

Wow! I feel like I’ve been blasted by an atomic bomb, but in a good way, if that makes any sense.

Here’s where I really wish I made it a practice to keep a daily journal. So much has happened in the past couple of weeks that it feels so overwhelming trying to type it all down at once. I guess I’ll just take it slow and add a little bit at a time. That’s a good way to process it in my own mind, too.

So, surprise #1: I stated in my last post that I was expecting Evan to show up around the seventh of August. He showed up on the 2nd. Yeah, he purposely misled me to think that he wouldn’t be here that soon, and then just showed up at my house, stood behind me, and waited for me to turn around. I have to say that I had it coming; I told him I loved surprises. He got the satisfaction of seeing me do a full double take, and I was definitely surprised. 🙂

He got here on a Saturday and was going to be leaving on Monday a week later. We had a great week, hanging out with my family and spending some time alone. When you’ve been talking to someone on the phone for nine months, it’s such a great thing to be able to look them in the eyes. He told me that he wanted to take me out to dinner one of these nights, so first he took me shopping for some new clothes. He got a little taste of my shopping style. ::evil grin while rubbing hands together:: If he can survive that and still want to be around me, then he must really be in love. 🙂

Thursday night surpassed all others for surprises. Surprise #2: He took me out to eat at the most expensive, high-class place in town. It was lovely, sitting across from him and sharing a piece of cake.

The most incredible surprise of all: After sitting at the restaurant and talking for an hour, he asked me to marry him! I was totally not expecting him to do that at that time! I had told him over the phone that I expected him to propose in person. 🙂 He said he wouldn’t have it any other way. Needless to say, I accepted.

We both decided not to try to set a date yet, as the fact that he lives in Idaho and I in Indiana makes it difficult to plan. We have also both agreed that we are leaving the exact time and place entirely up to God. We both absolutely love each other’s families and want them to be involved in everything, even though we are separated by 1,889 miles. God can plan these things so much better than we can; look at what He’s done already! Personally, I think it is amazing that two people can decide to leave their futures totally in the hands of a Person we cannot see. It is incredible that I have found someone who is willing to do that with me, someone who does trust God in that way. I know that my Father loves to shower His children with affection and love, surprising us in the best possible ways!

All I Want May 19, 2008

I cannot describe the impact that this video has on me. Everyone should see it at least once a week!

This song has been one of my favorites since I first heard it years ago, but when I saw the video, it made more sense and the words just fell into place. I can’t say too much about it because it speaks for itself, but I will just share which parts touched me the most.

In the beginning, Jesus is marveling over His creation, us. He woos us, courts us, shows us how much He loves us. Every beautiful thing in creation is a gift from Him.

When the man in black comes in and interrupts, it is our choice to make whether to hold onto Jesus or be attracted by the flashy distractions all around us. The beautiful things of creation become a tool against us when taken out of His Hands. Everything, one after the other, line up between us and Him, ’til it seems impossible to get back. But once we make the choice to get back to Him, He is waiting with open arms.

The most powerful part of the video for me was after everything had beaten her down and she was on her knees reaching out, JESUS JUMPED BETWEEN HER AND EVERYTHING IN HER PAST PUNISHING HER. He took the pain, the guilt, the punishment onto Himself, and came out victorious! He has done this and promises to continue to do this for everyone reaching for Him.

If you have the chance, please watch this video as well. It’s a take on the same skit, just redone a bit. I don’t think it’s better, but the part where she is fighting to get back to Jesus is definitely well done.

Lifehouse – Everything

Remember, grace means that no matter how far we walk away from Him, He never leaves us, but is just waiting to prove His love for us. Let Him!

Love Overflows May 13, 2008

One thing I’ve really learned about love this week. You got it… it overflows.

As John put it so succinctly, “We love because He first loved us.”

It’s so true. When you realize how much you are loved, love kind of fills you up and bubbles out the top. The ability to love people around you comes from the knowledge of how much you are loved at the moment. I am so thankful for all of the people in my life right now who love me and help me love back. But I’m thankful to Jesus most of all, for teaching me to see how much He has always loved me. This more than anything has enabled me to love, Him and others. I want to stop trying and just let the love overflow. 😀

Forgiven Much May 8, 2008

So right now, it seems that I’m caught up on the prodigal son story. Everywhere I look, I find something that reminds me of it. Like this video.

I was reading a book the other day and the author was recounting a story of a pastor who changed the end of the prodigal story. To see what his congregation would do, he said that the father gave the ring and feast to the other son, in reward for being faithful unlike his brother. Apparently, a woman in the back shouted, “That’s the way it should have been!”

I think it’s just amazing how human beings react to grace. When it is given to someone else, we call it unfair. When it is given to us, we call it amazing. There are so many parables that Jesus told about grace. The man who was forgiven millions of dollars, the prodigal son, the late workers who were paid the full amount. One of my favorites is of the two men that owed money. One man owed five hundred silver pieces; the other man owed fifty. Neither could pay, so the banker canceled both the debts. Which one was more grateful?

A very wise woman once told me that everyone has been forgiven the same amount, but we don’t always see it that way. Everyone owes the same impossible debt to pay, and Jesus paid it for us all.

So I’m guessing that the woman who heard the sermon and complained about the grace shown towards the prodigal son just doesn’t know how much she’s been forgiven for, and so is not as grateful. I haven’t done adultery, stealing, murder, etc. as some have, but my sins were just as great and God’s forgiveness of me just as amazing. I hope to never lose sight of that.

Getting Over It May 7, 2008

You ever have one of those days when everything was going just fine, then one little thing happened, like spilling bleach on your favorite shirt, that just seems to start this downward cycle into a bad mood. Little things just keep happening and snowball until you feel terrible. Part of feeling so bad is that you know this stuff is so petty and that it doesn’t have to make you feel this way. Before you know it, you’re grumpy because you are mad at yourself for overreacting and you lash out at the people around you. I hate it when that happens.

The thing that always seems to get at me is our small kitchen. 🙂 Seems like such a little thing when I write it down. I live in a family of six; all my siblings are teenagers. I love my family a lot, don’t get me wrong. They are some of the closest friends I have. Our kitchen has a floor space of about 6′ x 6′, and it can feel squished with two people. So it can be cramped when everyone is trying to get lunch. For some reason, that really annoys me, so I try to get my lunch either earlier or later than everyone else. 🙂 It just doesn’t always work. I’m a naturally clumsy person as well, which just compounds the problem for me.

So the thing that bothers me the most about this situation is how much it bothers me. I get this feeling that this is so petty! It’s not worth getting frustrated over, and it’s definitely not worth getting into a bad mood and being short with people. The funny thing is that the more I focus on how I shouldn’t be in a bad mood, the longer I stay there. This brings me to the conclusion that I really can’t change myself. Shocking, isn’t it? 😛 The only way to overcome this and to see any change is to give it over to God to change and trust Him for it. You know, that’s the only way my mood will change. If only I could remember that every time, instead of futilely trying to fix it myself for hours. 🙂